《[HP/GGAD] 魔法·哲学·书信》卧枕熊

40、后日谈（下）

　　“Who will love you now, Dumbledore?”

　　它耗尽了我所有的感情和精力。

　　我看着他的眼睛，那双曾经明亮、迷人、微笑的眼睛，如今充满了痛苦和挣扎。我不禁回忆起那些甜蜜的夏日，带着激情，带着梦想，带着爱。

　　我记得阳光，记得影子，记得耳语，记得夜晚。

　　我知道我爱过他，或许，现在依然爱着。我知道我无法欺骗我的心，但或许，我可以背叛自己的灵魂。我该用 "背叛 "这个词吗？我的身体曾经容纳一切，现在却变得无比空虚。

　　无意义、无望、绝望。

　　我试图寻找出路，却被蒙蔽了双眼。
　　被他，被爱，被毒药……
　　没有他，我看不到未来。
　　同样，我也看不到拥有他的未来。

　　我将所有的感情收集起来，埋藏在心底，等候多年，直到有一天，或者某个深夜，我将它们重新全部拿了出来。我深深地沉浸于其中，细细品味，耐心地，品尝着苦涩，这是我无法抗拒的毒药，从开始，到结束。

　　但，这与悔恨无关，现实就是如此。
　　我只能继续走下去。

　　直到最后。

　　- - -
　　“You're all alone.”

　　——————————————————————————————————

　　“Who will love you now, Dumbledore?”
　　- - -

　　It drained all my feelings and energy.

　　I look into his eyes, eyes that were once bright, charming, and smiling, but are now filled with pain and struggle. I can't help but remember those sweet summer days, with passion, with dreams, with love.

　　I remember the sunshine, the shadows, the whispers, the nights.

　　I know I loved him, and perhaps, still do. I know I can't cheat my heart, but perhaps, I can betray my soul. Should I use the word "betrayal"? My body, which once held everything, is now incredibly empty.

　　Meaningless, hopeless, and desperate.

　　I tried to find a way out, but I was blinded.
　　By him, by love, by poison...
　　I couldn’t see a future without him.
　　I couldn’t see the future with him.

　　I collected all my feelings, buried them in my heart, and waited for years, until one day, or some late night, I brought them all out again. I immersed myself deeply in them, savouring, patiently, the bitterness, the poison I couldn't resist, from the beginning, to the end.

　　It’s not about regret, it is what it is.
　　The only thing that I could do is go on and go on.
　　And go on.

　　Until the end.

　　- - -
　　“You’re all alone.”

---

作者有话要说：　　“Who will love you now, Dumbledore?”（"现在谁会爱你呢，邓布利多？"）
“You're all alone.”（"你孤身一人。"）
——《神奇动物在哪里：邓布利多之谜》
ps：实际上，如果可以的话，其实很希望大家可以看看英文版，英文是先写的，然后翻译成的中文，个人觉得可能更有感觉一点，所以也一起贴上来了（安详）。
那么，这本到此就完结啦，谢谢大家的陪伴！当初开文的时候想着这本肯定没什么人看，差不多打算安详躺平当做自己写给自己，沉浸式磕磕我流GGAD，回忆回忆那个情迷意乱的夏日，顺便沉浸式学习一下关于语言与符号的哲学。没想到还有小可爱愿意陪着我，甚至还有评论，超级惊喜TvT 谢谢大家么么么啾啾！！！祝大家生活天天开心顺利！！
ps：大家如果对某些章节的理论内容感兴趣，完全可以从标题的人物入手！！！